looking forward

there are a lot of things coming up in the next few weeks/months that im getting anxious about. of course there's christmas, new year, and turning twenty. but there's other stuff. looking forward to getting out of the house and into a new one. looking forward to recording new music, it's been far too long since i have recorded music that i really care about. really can't wait to see how the songs turn out.

looking forward to having conversations in song lyrics.

looking forward to finishing the semester and taking it easy for a few weeks. looking forward to snow and the smell of winter. looking forward to late friday nights at the vous with people i care about.

looking for more owls (very cool creature)

review: BMG

was just in Chicago visiting my uncle with my family for thanksgiving. he surprised us with tickets to see the Blue Man Group. i wasn't particularly excited to see them considering the fact that i associate them with cheezy weird, experimental, percussion instruments, zany antics, and the old Intel inside commercials. the show was actually very kewl. the music was entertaining and the blue men themselves were very funny.

the whole show was pretty artistic. it was cool to see so much color and creativity in modern art. seems like alot of modern art is just circles or lines and doesn't require a whole lot of creativity at all. just enjoyed feeling authentically excited about music and art in a different way.

if you ever get the chance, i suggest seeing the show sometime.

Eeeee Eee Eeee

thought i would try something different. I Finished reading this book and thought it would be cool to write a book review.

The book is called Eeee Eee Eeee and it's written by young alt author Tao Lin (the title is apparently the sound a dolphin makes when feeling alone, confused, or awkward). Tao is a somewhat successful author who is well known for his blog, Reader of Depressing Books and his poetry readings. His writing style is strange and hard to follow but is very funny and captivating.

Eeeee Eee Eeee is about Andrew, a twenty some year old post college kid who works at Dominos and recently moved from New York back to his home in Florida. Throughout the book he has interactions with talking animals such as dolphins, moose, bears (who like to put blankets over other animals heads when feeling threatened or annoyed), a hamster, and an alien. Andrew doesn't seem to like anything but being depressed, independent movies, and a girl named Sara who dumped him.

The plot is weird and slow but not boring. It's almost like there is no story to be told at all but it is still incredibly entertaining to read. It frequently jumps from present tense to past and sometimes goes into the lives of characters that don't have much to do with the story at all.

Overall a good read, not life changing or inspiring, just a good book to read to occupy some extra time.

rating: 3.5 out of 5

this is to that

cool is to average as

fixed is to bike,

manual is to automatic,

beer is to beverage,

and analog is to digital

went for a ride tonight. love night rides when there aren't many cars on the roads, i can be comfortable in just a flannel and sweatshirt, my bike is completely silent, and all i can hear is my own breathe.

stress

i am currently studying a chapter in my psychology class dedicated to the effect of stress on our body both physically and emotionally.

when we stress out about stuff it takes energy away from our immune systems, causing us to become sick easily, have trouble sleeping, and cause cardiovascular issues.

started to consider the amount of stress in my own life. contemplated for a while. and eventually decided that i have very few things to stress about. i consider myself a reasonably chill person who doesn't react harshly to my changing surroundings.

maybe its because i don't have a whole lot of things to stress out about, or i don't get put in stressful situations with high amounts of drama.

my text book says there are a few things you can do to handle stress

1) be more physically active. (i.e. lift weights, run, jog, ride a bike)

2) create a reliable social network of friends who you can rely on for comfort, help, and counseling in stressful situations.

3) do a lot of recreational drugs / consume a lot of alcohol and get hella drunk/high as a coping mechanism/memory eraser. (people seem to use this one the most even though its the least advised)

i used to have trouble sleeping. would stay up until 5 or 6 in the morning. i would lay in bed and try not to think about anything. think high school stressed me out and turned me into a temporary insomniac. the pressure of sports, social status, cultural relevance, and eventually going to college fucked me up.

growing up sucks sometimes

growing up is cool sometimes

what does stress do to you?

what do you do to stress?

good feelings

i have been in a relatively good mood lately. feel good about the show on friday and for the future plans with the band. i haven't been keeping myself clean lately. seems like i tend to not take care of myself on the weekends. i wore the same t-shirt and the same jeans all weekend and havent showered since thursday. i usually clean myself up atleast every 3 days or so but i'm feeling especially ratty right now. not sure wether to embrace the feeling or walk straight int the shower when i get home.

feeling embarrassed

today i was riding my bike down the Ransom hill from the grcc library to my next class on my fixed gear bike. Was going pretty fast because i had a green light and didnt want to have to stop. The light turned yellow so i had to skid to stop. When i tried to skid my chain popped off the cogs leaving me brakeless. I tried to put my foot on the front tire to slow me down but somehow ended up falling to my left and sliding on my side for a few feet. felt pretty embarrassed. luckily it was still fairly early in the morning so there weren't many people to see it happen. still embarrassed.

makes me think i need to do a better job working on my bike or put on a brake. deffinately dont want to put on a brake.

feeling the effects

things are much better when looked at in different ways. on the outside, things seem more clear. glad i came from the inside to view life from the outside. it makes more sense. saw how i got roped into things so easily. saw how i can't get roped into things so easily again.

wish i took my own advice more often. don't know what to tell people who ask for advice. wish more people were real to each other. wish more people weren't so fake oti, or behind the back.

heard that rob bliss loves getting/givving hj's to/from other men. (fact)

wish i was feeling the effects more so i could write more and with more typos. wish slurring my words came before passing out (like most people). wish pbr tasted like new castle but stayed the same price.

wish i lived with my friends. wish i had friends to live with. wish i had money to live with my friends.

wish people didn't judge. wish people didn't feel the need to be connected to other people just to say they 'know people'.

wish my friends lives with me. wish i wasn't about to sleep. wish i was still be having fun.

are wishes better than regrets?

are wishes just things you would regret in the future?

what do you regret?

right now i have zero regrets because i feel like i'm starting something new. something that will help or hurt depending on how i choose to go about it. cant say what it is for sure. but its got2b something.

probly wake up in the morning, feel stupid, then delete this post

wish gary busy would be a major character in more movies

Rah!Chester

being in a band again feels right. Haven't felt this connected to music in a while. I feel like when when i'm not making music and playing shows there is something wrong, like i can't find a reason to actually enjoy life.

can't wait to schedule shows, can't wait to record, can't wait to make stupid 'video updates' and post them on u-tube, can't wait for long drives with friends and a windstar full of gear, can't wait to have fun again.

feeling good about the future.